Seasons Come and Go

Ah...the end of a school year marks a change in mindset for all teachers. We turn into students as many of us attend professional development. We turn into domestic goddesses, finally catching up on projects around the house, doing the spring cleaning that most of us put off for grading papers, and actually cooking instead of ordering out. We finally find time for leisure reading, hobbies, or just hanging with the kids at the park or the pool. Just when we've had our fill of all that, it's time to jump back into the excitement and exhaustion of another school year.

I love teaching, but the political, financial, and community atmosphere of the last 2 years has really lowered my morale. I keep asking myself...why do I do this? I could be making more money at an easier job that recognizes my talents, skills, and appreciates my contribution. I get tired of being vilified by the community who THINKS they know what I do for a living, or looked at as a commodity to trade according to the whims of others. I tire of being a pawn for political manipulation. I'm exhausted from trying to meet the never ending demand of "more for less!" - all employees have their efficiency plateau. Teachers, it seems, are not allowed to have one. If they reach one level of productivity, well, then everyone seems to think they should be able to take that one more step... everyone seems to continue to expect BMW's at Pontiac prices. Or worse, many in the community are under the ridiculous impression that we are mere babysitters who work part time and are therefore overcompensated. It wears on the spirit, the work ethic, the professionalism. So why do I do it? I love it. I am gifted at it. I believe it is a vital, important job. Is there something else I could do? Absolutely. And I'd be wealthier financially. But I would not be as fulfilled. I would not feel the mandated purpose I feel now. Being a teacher, to me, is as important as being a parent. It's why I get up every morning. It fills my life with a mission. And I enjoy my clientele believe it or not. I did not choose teaching because it was an easy way to make a buck. I can name FAR easier professions. Visualize with me for a moment...you are attending your son or daughters sporting game, or practice, or rehearsal, or performance. If there is anyone sitting in the stands or in the audience doing work...who is it? A teacher. Teachers are not only "on" from 7 to 3. We are "on" 24/7...often doing work, answering e-mails, planning, spending our "free time" and our money on things for our students. Sometimes even to the neglect of our own families (i.e. report card week, week before a big concert or play, etc.)

If people want schools to be run like businesses, they had better be prepared to pay for it. As it is now, if the one thing that makes or breaks a school, your teachers, are considered overpaid...just wait until you have to pay us private sector prices. Right now, we are quite a bargain.

Enough of my tirade. Another season about to end for me is my season of singleness. It has been an important season for me. I've learned much about myself, my kids, my friends, my family, the body of Christ, and my God. Most of it has been good. I have also learned much about my previous 18 year relationship. Those were hard lessons. Hard to accept that much of what I thought or believed was simply untrue. That one person could go from best friend to worst enemy practically overnight. That someone you trusted implicitly could become the person you trust the least. That someone who you thought had your back was actually stabbing a knife in it. Betrayal is a bitter pill. It still lingers, creeps back into my heart and head from time to time. Its ever ready to consume me if I am not diligently working towards forgiveness.

This summer will be a whole new season...professionally, spiritually, relationally. I will be learning a new husband, new children, new domestic routines, all the while helping the other 5 members learn me and each other. No one said it was going to be easy...

But, then, I've never been one to take the easy road. ;)

Bring it on! I can do all things through CHRIST who strengthens me...