I took a break from wedding planning. It's not easy to find summery, garden stuff in the middle of January in Ohio - LOL! I figured I'd wait until spring styles and decor starts coming out in a month or two to start again.
School is doing OK. Got my second wind for the next semester. I had the kids evaluate me so I have some goals to work on for myself plus we are getting in to my very favorite part of Biology - genetics. Read a really interesting article on a new area of research called epigenetics thanks to an old friend of mine from FHS named Heather (who is a doctor, by the way). It's about this research to find correlations between nurture and nature- and they seem to be finding more of a relationship than previously thought and more than Darwin allowed for. Hmmmm...
We are also performing "School House Rock Live" at the high school. What a fun little show! Brings back many fond Saturday morning memories for me. :) Anyone in our area, come see the show this weekend. Tix are only $5. You'll find info on the Lakota East High School website. It's a perfect show for kids of all ages!
Steve and I attended the Lakota East Jazz Band Swing Dance last weekend. WHAT FUN!!!! I want to learn how to do that more. It's nice to be with someone who is willing to try new things with me - even if he doesn't think he's good at them. We had a fun time and the bands were really very good!
Got news from Ethan's teacher today - he is doing very well. Still need to work on his handwriting and he still gets easily distracted, but overall tremendous improvement. And he is reading like gang busters! I'm noticing maturity in him, too. He's becoming an amazing young man.
Noah is as funny as ever. His imagination is just too much! I came home yesterday and he's created a "stage" area and playing rock star. In his underware. hahahahahaha! HILARIOUS!
My ex is being as frustrating as ever. He's not doing right by the kids or by me with the finances. Very sporadic and inconsistent with his contact with the boys. Please pray. For his salvation and for God to move him in whatever direction is best for me and Ethan and Noah.
We will be entering "birthday season" soon. Just about the time I get Christmas paid for! HAHAHAHA! Oh, well...
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Monday, January 25, 2010
Honeymoon plans...
are confirmed and reservations made. And that's all I have to say about that! ;) My sweetie did REALLY WELL! It's going to be wonderfully relaxing and romantic! (giggle)
Thursday, January 14, 2010
wedding plans...
OK, now that the holidays are done (check) and the quarter is coming to a close with finals this week (check), I'm actually getting excited about planning my wedding! Who knew? Since we are doing this in June, and it's a second, it will be a casual, garden-themed party with family. We are planning a very lovely, meaningful service that involves all the kids, having a picnic style reception and dancing, dancing, dancing!
One thing that clinched the garden theme was my Monarchs. I have raised them since 1999 in MN. I miss them here in Ohio - oh we get a few towards the last third of the summer, but nothing like in MN. Those insects have been a source of pleasure and inspiration for me for years. They have made their way into my curriculum, into my decor, into my extra curricular activities, into my sermons, into my wardrobe, and into my life and heart. Oh, the lessons I have gleaned from these marvelous creatures. And I've decided to release some symbolically at my wedding.
They are a symbol of tenacity. Beating the odds, ahead of the fray. Of renewal - renewal of spirit, body, mind, and hope. A symbol of beauty and grace. Delicate yet strong. Attractive yet poisonous. I'm such a sucker for paradox! ;) Even the contrast of their orange wings against the backdrop of a clear blue sky - opposing colors - draws me.
We are also going to opt for a sand ceremony rather than a candle. I think it lends itself to a blended family better and can include the children more.
I will keep all of you posted on how the plans go complete with pics as appropriate and available. I wish I could throw a shin dig and have all of you who have played such an instrumental part in my life here with me. From Fairfield High School, to Lee University, to Minnesota - so many friends who are dear to me. I know you will be with me in spirit on June 12th, 2010 at 4:30PM! And I will be reflecting on how I am who I am partly because each of you planted a little bit of yourselves in my life somewhere along the line. Thank you. I love you all!
One thing that clinched the garden theme was my Monarchs. I have raised them since 1999 in MN. I miss them here in Ohio - oh we get a few towards the last third of the summer, but nothing like in MN. Those insects have been a source of pleasure and inspiration for me for years. They have made their way into my curriculum, into my decor, into my extra curricular activities, into my sermons, into my wardrobe, and into my life and heart. Oh, the lessons I have gleaned from these marvelous creatures. And I've decided to release some symbolically at my wedding.
They are a symbol of tenacity. Beating the odds, ahead of the fray. Of renewal - renewal of spirit, body, mind, and hope. A symbol of beauty and grace. Delicate yet strong. Attractive yet poisonous. I'm such a sucker for paradox! ;) Even the contrast of their orange wings against the backdrop of a clear blue sky - opposing colors - draws me.
We are also going to opt for a sand ceremony rather than a candle. I think it lends itself to a blended family better and can include the children more.
I will keep all of you posted on how the plans go complete with pics as appropriate and available. I wish I could throw a shin dig and have all of you who have played such an instrumental part in my life here with me. From Fairfield High School, to Lee University, to Minnesota - so many friends who are dear to me. I know you will be with me in spirit on June 12th, 2010 at 4:30PM! And I will be reflecting on how I am who I am partly because each of you planted a little bit of yourselves in my life somewhere along the line. Thank you. I love you all!
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Friday, January 1, 2010
HAPPY 2010!
Fancy dinner at the White House Inn, quality time with my sweetie, a kiss at midnight...ah. New hope, new life, new year.
Song of Solomon 2:10-16 "My darling, my beautiful one, come along. For behold, the winter is past, the rain is over and gone; The flowers appear on the earth...arise, my love, and come away...My beloved is mine and I am His."
Isaiah 54:4-8 "Do not be afraid: you will not suffer shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated. You will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood. For your Maker is your husband - the Lord Almighty is His name (El-Shaddai) - the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; He is called the God of all the earth. The Lord will call you back as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit - 'a wife who married young, only to be rejected', says your God..."
Song of Solomon 2:10-16 "My darling, my beautiful one, come along. For behold, the winter is past, the rain is over and gone; The flowers appear on the earth...arise, my love, and come away...My beloved is mine and I am His."Isaiah 54:4-8 "Do not be afraid: you will not suffer shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated. You will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood. For your Maker is your husband - the Lord Almighty is His name (El-Shaddai) - the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; He is called the God of all the earth. The Lord will call you back as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit - 'a wife who married young, only to be rejected', says your God..."
Thursday, December 31, 2009
fallout?
I've been contemplating today. I think I am beginning to recognize one of the scars left on my heart from my divorce. Rejection. I anticipate it. I am a bit hypersensitive to it. I now have a tendency to feel it even when it doesn't really exist. If something negative happens, I tend to wrap it around this theme of rejection.
A good example: I went back to my vocal therapist yesterday. I've been experiencing some anomalies with my voice...tiredness, slight hoarseness (not like before, but a weird glitch or catch in my voice in the upper register/transition notes). I was hoping the verdict would be lack of sleep, too much caffeine, not enough water - things I can control. Instead, I have a sulcus, or scar left from the surgery.
What does this mean? I don't know. It may mean my singing days and theater days are over. This makes me tremendously sad - beyond what I can even express. It may mean I have to learn ways around it. It may be correctable with the right procedure and right doctor. But a lot of that depends on price, etc. Immediately, I feel rejected by God. I feel as if He is taking away a talent and pleasure He blessed me with and I have been careful to use to glorify Him for these many years.
Why do I jump right to rejection? Why, if someone important to me is having a bad day, do I feel rejected? Why, if someone corrects my children or can't handle their energy and needs them to calm down, do I feel rejected? Why, if a friend is not particularly talkative, or doesn't seem interested in meeting me for lunch, do I feel rejected? Why, when my children are rejected for some awkward social behavior,do I feel also rejected? I believe this is fallout from my ordeal that I am going to have to learn some coping mechanisms for.
I guess I knew, deep down, there would be fallout. There would be scars. There would be emotional leftovers that I will deal with for a while. I just hoped it was nothing huge or overwhelming. This feels a little overwhelming for me. I'm not used to being as emotionally crippled as I have for the past almost 3 years. I've always considered myself a rather stable and healthy person who is able to consider the many sides of a circumstance and logically override my feelings - eventually. I bounce back. But this tendency to immediately feel rejected has caught me off guard and I'm not sure what to do about it from here. As they say, recognition is the first step.And the length of time that I have been rehabilitating is hard for me. I'm a destination girl, not a journey girl. Patience is not one of my stronger areas.:)
I do remember a times earlier in my life that I felt rejection really keenly like this. And, of course, usually it was during a time that I was having to deal with Rob's porn and emotional/spiritual betrayal. I also remember pouring my heart out to the Lord and Him telling me "I'm letting you feel this so you can help others who do". In other words, He was letting me know this feeling is not unique to me...most of us feel it. Perhaps my heightened awareness is a message that I need to reach out to others and do more to make sure others do not feel rejected by me.
It is a good reminder...even the most composed, confident, poised, "all together" person around us feels rejected and vulnerable sometimes. We should all remember to pour ourselves out to others as much as we can.
A good example: I went back to my vocal therapist yesterday. I've been experiencing some anomalies with my voice...tiredness, slight hoarseness (not like before, but a weird glitch or catch in my voice in the upper register/transition notes). I was hoping the verdict would be lack of sleep, too much caffeine, not enough water - things I can control. Instead, I have a sulcus, or scar left from the surgery.
What does this mean? I don't know. It may mean my singing days and theater days are over. This makes me tremendously sad - beyond what I can even express. It may mean I have to learn ways around it. It may be correctable with the right procedure and right doctor. But a lot of that depends on price, etc. Immediately, I feel rejected by God. I feel as if He is taking away a talent and pleasure He blessed me with and I have been careful to use to glorify Him for these many years.
Why do I jump right to rejection? Why, if someone important to me is having a bad day, do I feel rejected? Why, if someone corrects my children or can't handle their energy and needs them to calm down, do I feel rejected? Why, if a friend is not particularly talkative, or doesn't seem interested in meeting me for lunch, do I feel rejected? Why, when my children are rejected for some awkward social behavior,do I feel also rejected? I believe this is fallout from my ordeal that I am going to have to learn some coping mechanisms for.
I guess I knew, deep down, there would be fallout. There would be scars. There would be emotional leftovers that I will deal with for a while. I just hoped it was nothing huge or overwhelming. This feels a little overwhelming for me. I'm not used to being as emotionally crippled as I have for the past almost 3 years. I've always considered myself a rather stable and healthy person who is able to consider the many sides of a circumstance and logically override my feelings - eventually. I bounce back. But this tendency to immediately feel rejected has caught me off guard and I'm not sure what to do about it from here. As they say, recognition is the first step.And the length of time that I have been rehabilitating is hard for me. I'm a destination girl, not a journey girl. Patience is not one of my stronger areas.:)
I do remember a times earlier in my life that I felt rejection really keenly like this. And, of course, usually it was during a time that I was having to deal with Rob's porn and emotional/spiritual betrayal. I also remember pouring my heart out to the Lord and Him telling me "I'm letting you feel this so you can help others who do". In other words, He was letting me know this feeling is not unique to me...most of us feel it. Perhaps my heightened awareness is a message that I need to reach out to others and do more to make sure others do not feel rejected by me.
It is a good reminder...even the most composed, confident, poised, "all together" person around us feels rejected and vulnerable sometimes. We should all remember to pour ourselves out to others as much as we can.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Holiday Greetings
No Christmas Cards this year, folks...nor a newsletter. You've been with me throughout the year on FB, my blog, and via e-mail, so there is no big news you are not aware of. And I can share more love electronically. So have a blessed holiday season all of you! You are in the thoughts and prayers of Lori, Ethan, and Noah. We love you all very much. May the miracle of Christmas stay with you throughout the new year - Emmanuel has come and dwelt among us, has become one of us. What love would leave the glory of Heaven for the confines of Earth? A perfect, unconditional love. Agape love.
Noah the donkey - Hamilton COG program
Ethan sang his heart out this year! HCOG program
Silly brothers - HGOG
Santa Noah
Santa Ethan
Ethan got a speaking part at school this year: Penguin #4 (Ridgeway elementary program)
Penguin #4 mugging for the camera (school program)
people who dress their dogs are a little weird (ahem - Brandon, Carla, Steve...) Here dad poses with Lola who clearly thinks she's people.
the tree at HCOG - the ladies always decorate them so nicely.
Donkey Noah
Ethan wanted to be sure I saw him! LOL!
Back at Niedermans...
The rest of the family festivities conclude this week. More pics will follow!
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Thanksgiving images
Noah's daycare did a little play and dinner for parents before Thanksgiving. It was cute - Noah was a pilgrim.
Of course, it wasn't very politically correct...here the pilgrims are celebrating "Indian style" complete with hopping and whooping...
Then all the kids got to say what they were thankful for. Noah was thankful for mommy and his toys. :)
The daycare workers put an entire thanksgiving spread together - it was delicious! I took off for 4th and 5th period so I could join Noah for lunch.
I got to spend a lot of wonderful, quality time with my love over the weekend while the boys were with their dad. Of course, we did a lot of texting... Ah, romance in the 21st century! LOL!
Holiday Train Display
A local family owns a farm and has a train aficionado who has built a barn dedicated almost entirely to his hobby. He used it this year as a fund raiser for Children's Hospital...it was really incredible. The photos don't do it justice.
Monday, December 21, 2009
Leaf fun
Not sure how I missed these pics, but they are so much fun! I came home from school one day to find my boys playing in the leaves Grandpa was desperately trying to blow from the yard...he was finally successful but it took much longer than normal. Especially when mommy jumped out of the car and begin to play along... :)
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